Every day you wake up and think "the world can't get any worse". And every day it turns out you're wrong.
I don't know what makes a monster.
I don't know what kind of animal wakes up and decides to murder a child, let alone 20.
I don't know whether he had a terrible upbringing, whether his parents carved his evil, or if he was just born twisted.
What I do know is this; we are a nation of narcissists. Right now politicians and ordinary citizens are beating their chests, lighting their torches and raising their banners. "Guns don't kill people." "If we get rid of the guns, things like this wouldn't happen."
What those people won't be saying is the truth. There is evil in the world. Bad things happen to the undeserving and the innocent. There is nothing you can do to prevent that. And Right, Left or in the Middle, we failed those children.
Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Green Party... as a whole, we failed them.
I didn't put a gun in the hand of the killer just by supporting the Second Amendment. You didn't make him crazy by supporting Obamacare. But though we can't account for one lone mad man with a gun, what we have done over years and decades is foster an environment that makes it easier for things like this to happen.
I think it started well before I was born, but I know it happened in my lifetime. You can feel it in the air. This isn't the world we were given. And it damn sure isn't the world we were promised. We made it worse. We got lazy. We got careless. We became entitled and self-satisfied. We created a nation of narcissists.
It's a narcissist that thinks so little about others that he slaughters children.
It's a narcissist that uses 27 dead bodies to win an argument about politics.
And it's a narcissist that looks outward for blame, instead of looking inward and saying "what can I do?"
Do you want to know what you can do to the slow the decay? Do you want to know how best to create a safer environment for your children? Do you want to know how you can best honor the dead?
Be a better person.
Wake up tomorrow and try to be a better person than you were the day before. And the next day, do the same. And the next. And the next.
When you're in a bad mood, don't put it on the people you work and live with.
If you have to talk about politics, stop treating the other side like they are your enemy. They're not evil. They merely have a different opinion. And ask yourself, do you want what is best for everyone, or do you merely want to be right?
Don't demonize the beliefs of others. For the atheists, this should especially be tragic, as those lives are simply gone. For the religious, it is tragic still. And if there is a day when you should want to believe in God and Heaven, this is it.
Be a better friend, a better husband or daughter. Be a better student or a harder worker. I don't know if there is a God or a Heaven, but what I do know is that life is short and precious. All that we have in this world is what we give and put out. How will you be remembered? Did you leave the world a better place than you found it? Or did you selfishly squander the opportunities you had?
Be a better person. Maybe one kind word will stop a kid from jumping off of a bridge. Maybe a positive influence keeps someone off of drugs.
Or maybe it just makes your life more worthwhile. But it's as close to truth as you will ever find.
Friday, December 14, 2012
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Vacation Playlists and Comics
Tomorrow I am officially off on vacation, heading back where I belong. Walt Disney World, or as I like to call it, home.
As with most people, a lot goes into planning a vacation. Tickets. Packing. Transportation. And of course, the most important part... playlists and comics.
I never go on any trip without first grabbing a couple of trades to read in transit or at night. It's not simply a ritual. It's an absolute necessity.
And music is another absolute must. Whether I'm walking across Walt Disney World, lounging by a pool or waiting on a plane, I have to have music at all times.
So I thought I would share some of my playlists for this trip.
COMICS:
Plane Ride Playlist
As with most people, a lot goes into planning a vacation. Tickets. Packing. Transportation. And of course, the most important part... playlists and comics.
I never go on any trip without first grabbing a couple of trades to read in transit or at night. It's not simply a ritual. It's an absolute necessity.
And music is another absolute must. Whether I'm walking across Walt Disney World, lounging by a pool or waiting on a plane, I have to have music at all times.
So I thought I would share some of my playlists for this trip.
COMICS:
- Starman Omnibus volume 1
- Astonishing X-Men: Unstoppable
- Fables: The Homelands
Plane Ride Playlist
- Watching Airplanes -Gary Allen
- Vienna -Ariana Grande
- I'll Be Coming Home Next Year -Foo Fighters
- Wylclef Jean -Gone til November
- Almost Home -Craig Morgan
- Anything But Mine -Kenny Chesney
- Baggage Claim -Miranda Lambert
- Big Pimpin -Jay Z
- Fly Me to the Moon -Sinatra
- In the Ayer -Flo Rida
- On the Road Again -Willie Nelson
- Hapa Duniani (Animal Kingdom)
- Soarin (Epcot)
- Monorail spiel
- Illuminations (Epcot)
- Muppet Show theme -OK Go
- Man or Muppet -Jason Seigel
- Rainbow Connection -Weezer
- What We Came Here For -Demi Lovato/ Joe Jonas
- Give Your Heart a Break -Demi Lovato
- Love You Like a Love Song -Selena Gomez
- Good Life -OneRepublic
- If You Want Blood- ACDC
- Forever and Almost Always -Kate Voegele
- Angel -Kate Voegele
- I and Love and You -Avett Brothers
- This is Country Music -Brad Paisley
- If That Ain't Country -David Allen Coe
- Suspicion -Elvis
- Suspicious Minds -Elvis
- Drink in My Hand -Eric Church
- Springsteen -Eric Church
- Friends in Low Places -Garth Brooks
- Get Off on the Pain -Gary Allen
- I don't Wanna Be -Gavin De Graw
- Troubadour -George Strait
- Crazy -Cee Lo
- Simple and Clean -Hikaru Utada
- That Lonesome Song -Jamey Johnson
- One More Drinkin Song -Jerrod Neimann
- Raise the Barn -Kieth Urban/ Ronnie Dunn
- Superstar -Lupe Fiasco
- Without Me -Eminem
- Save You -Matthew Perryman Jones
- Me and Mrs Jones -Michael Buble
- Whatever -Our Lady Piece
- Winter -Sister Hazel
- Kristofferson -Tim McGraw
- Are You Sure Hank Done It This Way? -Waylon Jennings
- Rehab -Amy Winehouse
- Just Like Heaven -Liz Gillies
- Lights -Ellie Golding
- The Seashores of Old Mexico
- I Wanna Rock -Twisted Sister
- The Train I'm On -The Farm
- Stay With Me -Miranda Lambert
- Down -Miranda Lambert
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Disney Wishes List
I was listening to a Disney podcast and thinking about my upcoming trip. I thought about all the things I'd done, all the things I wanted to do and all the things I'll probably never get to do. It made me want to put together a Disney Wishes List--- things to do with Disney before you die.
Now these are sorted from least probable, to totally possible.
Now these are sorted from least probable, to totally possible.
- Stay in the Cinderella's Castle Suite. This is honestly never going to happen, but it's at the top of the list. It might seem strange because the room is designed really for little girls. The thing is, my fondest memories of working in the Magic Kingdom were the nights when I had to pick up strollers after the park was closed. All the lights and music were on and it felt like the whole park was there just for me. I'd love to have a whole night like that.
- Tour of Hong Kong Disneyland, Tokyo Disneyland and Tokyo Disney Sea. This is where it gets marginally more possible, but due to money restraints, highly improbable. Disney Sea seems to have very little to do with Disney, but it is marvelous from what I've seen. Even without the Disney, this would be an amazing trip.
- Book an Adventures by Disney trip. Anyone who knows me can tell you that I've always been drawn by adventure. Adv by Disney has a host of trips I would love to take.
- Disney Cruise Line + Walt Disney World. Eventually I will do a Disney Cruise, but here I'm talking about specifically a 7 day cruise- probably to Castaway Cay followed by a week at Disney.
- Dinner at Club 33. The most exclusive restaurant and club in all of Disney. Located above the Pirates of the Caribbean in New Orleans Square at Disneyland, the only way to eat here is if you are a member of Club 33 (and there's a waiting list for that) or if you know a member willing to get you a reservation. Too cool.
- 4 Days at Disneyland, staying at the Big Thunder Mountain Suite. Combine this with #5. Disneyland has gotten more impressive in the last few years. Carsland at the California Adventure has made it all the more of a must do.
- 5 Signature Restaurants. I want to do five of the most exclusive signature restaurants in one trip. No expense too great. Eating like a king.
- Illuminations on the Lagoon. I love Illuminations. Favorite show ever. Did you know you can rent a pontoon boat and watch the show on the water?
- Stay at the Beach Club. Disney has some amazing hotels, but the Yacht and Beach Club is the most exclusive. The Beach Club pools cannot be swam in without a Beach Club resort key.
- La Nuba. Cirque du Soleil has it's own theatre at Downtown Disney. I've never been.
- Stay at Animal Kingdom and do the Safari tour. The AK Lodge and Wilderness Lodge are my two favorite resorts. Never stayed at either. AK Lodge actually offers an early morning tour of the grounds where they keep the animals. Pretty cool.
- Fishing with my Dad. I hate fishing, but my Dad loves it. But there are fishing excursions (catch and release) at Disney. I wouldn't mind a few hours with him on Bay Lake.
Those are my To-Do's. What's on your Wishes list?
Friday, July 20, 2012
The Dark Knight Rises Killer
My website is down, but I wanted to comment on this morning's horrible news in Colorado. I know there will be a lot of voices echoing the same sentiments, but I feel compelled.
I haven't really been all that anxious to see The Dark Knight Rises, so the idea of a midnight showing was laughable. Still, I know a lot of people who were at movie theaters at midnight last night, waiting on pins and needles for the curtain to rise. Thousands of people across the country repeated this scene. Regular folks. People just like me and you who just wanted to see a film about heroes.
In Aurora, Colorado, regular people like you and I walked into a theater to see Batman. But instead of seeing a hero, they saw evil. A young man in his 20's (reportedly named James Holmes) burst in the back door of the theater and started tossing smoke bombs. He then lifted his AK-47 assault rifle and opened fire. The reported death count comes to 14, including a 3 month old baby and a 6 year old. 50 people are injured, with no word of their condition.
The really sad part? At first, the people in the theater thought it was somehow part of the show. They didn't react for a few moments. We've gone so insane as a nation that the lines between reality and fiction have blurred. Had I been there, would my common sense have prevailed? Or would I simply have believed it to be a marketing stunt?
In comics, villains run the gamut from goofy to horrifying, but they never really scare you. We know it's fiction. The Joker isn't real. The Red Skull isn't going to lead a Nazi army into the 21st century. Reality is a lot more terrifying. No one could predict some dirt bag opening fire in a crowded theater. No one could predict that people would leave their houses to see a movie and never come back.
The man holding that military assault rifle is evil.
Part of me wonders if this was a joke to him. Killing people in a movie theatre showing Batman? The symmetry seems planned. And that would make me sadder than anything. I love comics. To see them perverted this way would pain me. I know that's not important in the face of this tragedy, but it bothers me.
Over the next few weeks we're going to see constant reports. We're going to know this evil's face, name, background, sob story and motivation. He'll be infamous, like a real life Joker. But we won't know the names of all the dead an scarred. Maybe one of the women sells insurance. Maybe one is an old man who grew up reading Batman. Many are probably people in their teens and twenties. We won't get to know them. They'll be lost in the sensational story of this monster and the politicians who hope to capitalize on it for their own benefit.
That's the real tragedy.
My thoughts and prayers go out to the people who are gone and the people who have to keep on living with this for the rest of their lives.
Sometimes I wish there really was a Batman to save us. But Superman doesn't exist, and there are no capes for the fallen.
I haven't really been all that anxious to see The Dark Knight Rises, so the idea of a midnight showing was laughable. Still, I know a lot of people who were at movie theaters at midnight last night, waiting on pins and needles for the curtain to rise. Thousands of people across the country repeated this scene. Regular folks. People just like me and you who just wanted to see a film about heroes.
In Aurora, Colorado, regular people like you and I walked into a theater to see Batman. But instead of seeing a hero, they saw evil. A young man in his 20's (reportedly named James Holmes) burst in the back door of the theater and started tossing smoke bombs. He then lifted his AK-47 assault rifle and opened fire. The reported death count comes to 14, including a 3 month old baby and a 6 year old. 50 people are injured, with no word of their condition.
The really sad part? At first, the people in the theater thought it was somehow part of the show. They didn't react for a few moments. We've gone so insane as a nation that the lines between reality and fiction have blurred. Had I been there, would my common sense have prevailed? Or would I simply have believed it to be a marketing stunt?
In comics, villains run the gamut from goofy to horrifying, but they never really scare you. We know it's fiction. The Joker isn't real. The Red Skull isn't going to lead a Nazi army into the 21st century. Reality is a lot more terrifying. No one could predict some dirt bag opening fire in a crowded theater. No one could predict that people would leave their houses to see a movie and never come back.
The man holding that military assault rifle is evil.
Part of me wonders if this was a joke to him. Killing people in a movie theatre showing Batman? The symmetry seems planned. And that would make me sadder than anything. I love comics. To see them perverted this way would pain me. I know that's not important in the face of this tragedy, but it bothers me.
Over the next few weeks we're going to see constant reports. We're going to know this evil's face, name, background, sob story and motivation. He'll be infamous, like a real life Joker. But we won't know the names of all the dead an scarred. Maybe one of the women sells insurance. Maybe one is an old man who grew up reading Batman. Many are probably people in their teens and twenties. We won't get to know them. They'll be lost in the sensational story of this monster and the politicians who hope to capitalize on it for their own benefit.
That's the real tragedy.
My thoughts and prayers go out to the people who are gone and the people who have to keep on living with this for the rest of their lives.
Sometimes I wish there really was a Batman to save us. But Superman doesn't exist, and there are no capes for the fallen.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Did I Ask for Your Fucking Opinion?
A few weeks ago I was in Barnes and Noble. I love that place, but I have a really odd relationship with books. I fucking love books. I love reading, mostly because I developed a love of comics as a kid. But for some reason I only read comics in phases. There are periods of time when I'm a voracious reader; then suddenly a switch goes off and I can't pick up a regular book for months. Despite this, I still have a desire to buy books any time I see something I want to read.
I've been listening to a lot of Adam Carolla's podcast lately. Aside from being very funny, I like it because he and I seem to be very similar guys. Granted, he's had a much harder life, has a much stronger drive and is 1000 times more successful. But we do have incredibly similar... thought processes, right down to my shock in hearing that he also has a few symptoms of Asperger's Syndrome. So I went to Barnes and Noble looking for his two books: In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks and Not Taco Bell Material.
I went over to the comedy section, spotted In Fifty Years* and picked it up, but didn't see Not Taco Bell Material. I thought it might be under the Auto Biography section, but when I looked it wasn't there either. I went over to the customer service desk and waited. For some reason there's never anyone at the customer service desk at Barnes and Noble, yet I never take the hint. Eventually a very large black girl walks up with that look that they always have when you're at that counter. The look accompanies the words "Can I help you?" and translates it to "The fuck you want?" Judging by her way too tight clothing and speech patterns, I didn't take her for a Love Lines fan, but I try not to assume anything about anyone.
"I'm looking for a book by a guy named Adam Carolla."
"UGH. You not lookin' for that We'll All Be Chicks bullshit, are you?"
And I had two thoughts. First: how the fuck does someone with her obvious charm, wit and class find gainful employment in a book store? Secondly, I was feeling shame. I'm almost never ashamed of my behavior, so I didn't know what to do. I let the first book in my hand sink below the counter for a moment, not wanting her to see it. Then my common sense kicked in. What the fuck business is it of hers what I'm reading? Is she suddenly a $6 an hour consultant for the New Yorker or is she a cashier?
"No. I have that one." I placed it on the table so she could see it. "I'm looking for his other book. I think it had something to do with not liking Taco Bell."
"HMMPH." Ah, yes. "Hmmph." Because she's not allowed to say things like "Oh, you're one of THOSE people." in a work environment. I politely ignored her semi-syllabic jab as I waited for her to finish searching the system for the book. She did find the listing, but the book isn't out yet. I thanked her for help and walked away.
I took a minute to check Facebook on my phone, because apparently I can't go five minutes without finding out if someone has "lol'ed" my status update. While I was doing that, there was a frail looking girl in her 20's manning the check-out counter. But as I started to walk toward her, the customer service bitch went over and told her to take her lunch break. Well... FUCK.
So I put my book down and took out my debit card. But of course she can't resist the chance to once again let me know what the fuck she thinks. "Yeeeeah. Not Taco Bell material, huh? Yeah, I think he's more like Burger King material!"
Now, if you've known me for more than 10 minutes, you know that I'm the kind of asshole his always getting into it with people who can't seem to keep their mouth shut. What you may not know about me is that I don't actually enjoy fighting with people. The unwavering stupidity of humanity just depresses the shit out of me. When I walked into that store, all I wanted to do was buy some books and go about my business. The last thing I needed was ghetto Statler and Waldorf taking out her fat fucking insecurity out on me. And yes, I know that it's the height of hypocrisy for someone like me to criticize someone for their weight. But if I'm "morbidly obese", this chick was "desperately seeking weight watchers". Also? She was a cunt. So fuck her.
What the fuck is with people now where everyone needs to give you their gawdamn opinion on every fucking thing you do? What the fuck happened to minding your own gawdamn business? Yeah, I want to read Adam Carolla's books. So the fuck what? I don't judge her for reading Twilight or the Tracy Morgan autobiography with the prickly end of a hairbrush in her pussy. You get $6 a fucking hour to sell books, not to give me your G.E.D. -backed rendition of Mystery Science Theater 3000. So sell me my damn book and shut the fuck up.
The moral of this story? If you've got snark, shove it up your ass.
I've been listening to a lot of Adam Carolla's podcast lately. Aside from being very funny, I like it because he and I seem to be very similar guys. Granted, he's had a much harder life, has a much stronger drive and is 1000 times more successful. But we do have incredibly similar... thought processes, right down to my shock in hearing that he also has a few symptoms of Asperger's Syndrome. So I went to Barnes and Noble looking for his two books: In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks and Not Taco Bell Material.
I went over to the comedy section, spotted In Fifty Years* and picked it up, but didn't see Not Taco Bell Material. I thought it might be under the Auto Biography section, but when I looked it wasn't there either. I went over to the customer service desk and waited. For some reason there's never anyone at the customer service desk at Barnes and Noble, yet I never take the hint. Eventually a very large black girl walks up with that look that they always have when you're at that counter. The look accompanies the words "Can I help you?" and translates it to "The fuck you want?" Judging by her way too tight clothing and speech patterns, I didn't take her for a Love Lines fan, but I try not to assume anything about anyone.
"I'm looking for a book by a guy named Adam Carolla."
"UGH. You not lookin' for that We'll All Be Chicks bullshit, are you?"
And I had two thoughts. First: how the fuck does someone with her obvious charm, wit and class find gainful employment in a book store? Secondly, I was feeling shame. I'm almost never ashamed of my behavior, so I didn't know what to do. I let the first book in my hand sink below the counter for a moment, not wanting her to see it. Then my common sense kicked in. What the fuck business is it of hers what I'm reading? Is she suddenly a $6 an hour consultant for the New Yorker or is she a cashier?
"No. I have that one." I placed it on the table so she could see it. "I'm looking for his other book. I think it had something to do with not liking Taco Bell."
"HMMPH." Ah, yes. "Hmmph." Because she's not allowed to say things like "Oh, you're one of THOSE people." in a work environment. I politely ignored her semi-syllabic jab as I waited for her to finish searching the system for the book. She did find the listing, but the book isn't out yet. I thanked her for help and walked away.
I took a minute to check Facebook on my phone, because apparently I can't go five minutes without finding out if someone has "lol'ed" my status update. While I was doing that, there was a frail looking girl in her 20's manning the check-out counter. But as I started to walk toward her, the customer service bitch went over and told her to take her lunch break. Well... FUCK.
So I put my book down and took out my debit card. But of course she can't resist the chance to once again let me know what the fuck she thinks. "Yeeeeah. Not Taco Bell material, huh? Yeah, I think he's more like Burger King material!"
Now, if you've known me for more than 10 minutes, you know that I'm the kind of asshole his always getting into it with people who can't seem to keep their mouth shut. What you may not know about me is that I don't actually enjoy fighting with people. The unwavering stupidity of humanity just depresses the shit out of me. When I walked into that store, all I wanted to do was buy some books and go about my business. The last thing I needed was ghetto Statler and Waldorf taking out her fat fucking insecurity out on me. And yes, I know that it's the height of hypocrisy for someone like me to criticize someone for their weight. But if I'm "morbidly obese", this chick was "desperately seeking weight watchers". Also? She was a cunt. So fuck her.
What the fuck is with people now where everyone needs to give you their gawdamn opinion on every fucking thing you do? What the fuck happened to minding your own gawdamn business? Yeah, I want to read Adam Carolla's books. So the fuck what? I don't judge her for reading Twilight or the Tracy Morgan autobiography with the prickly end of a hairbrush in her pussy. You get $6 a fucking hour to sell books, not to give me your G.E.D. -backed rendition of Mystery Science Theater 3000. So sell me my damn book and shut the fuck up.
The moral of this story? If you've got snark, shove it up your ass.
Monday, May 7, 2012
Math
Of our entire solar system and known space, an area so broad that you couldn't properly conceive of the distance even were you to see it expressed mathematically, only one planet currently sustains life forms.
On that planet, an unseen and unimaginable force caused thousands of species to sprout from nothing into existence over the course of billions of years.
Of those thousands of species, one has managed to become dominant, not through the act of breeding, but by sheer luck of evolutionary favorability.
This species evolved intellectually to the point where it has conceived of imaginary existences and fictional worlds that can be projected on screens, built constructs that operate themselves, artificially given itself the ability to fly and even created magic devices that remember thoughts and talk to all points on the planet at any given time.
Every sentence above is a miracle so mathematically improbable, so intellectually unfathomable that we cannot conceive of words to properly express them.
Yet 99% of people will never know nor appreciate this fact.
On that planet, an unseen and unimaginable force caused thousands of species to sprout from nothing into existence over the course of billions of years.
Of those thousands of species, one has managed to become dominant, not through the act of breeding, but by sheer luck of evolutionary favorability.
This species evolved intellectually to the point where it has conceived of imaginary existences and fictional worlds that can be projected on screens, built constructs that operate themselves, artificially given itself the ability to fly and even created magic devices that remember thoughts and talk to all points on the planet at any given time.
Every sentence above is a miracle so mathematically improbable, so intellectually unfathomable that we cannot conceive of words to properly express them.
Yet 99% of people will never know nor appreciate this fact.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
CRITICAL MASS
My brother decided the other day that he doesn't want to be on the family cell phone plan with me and my Dad. This isn't the first time he has made that decision, but that's another story.
We're on AT&T Wireless. My brother and I both have iPhones and I pay my old man's bill for his cheapo because otherwise he just wouldn't get a phone. There's no real reason to separate the lines, but whatever. He can do what he wants.
So I went down to AT&T and explained the situation. The woman behind the counter says "okay, we just need to run your credit." Excuse me?
Apparently this is a thing that cell phone companies do now. They run your fucking credit so that you can get a fucking phone. They run. Your fucking credit. So that you can get a fucking phone.
And that is where I snapped.
I think we've finally done it. We've reached a point in this country where the level stupidity has reached critical mass and I'm not sure we can come back from the brink.
Now, you may be thinking I'm over-reacting. I get it. People don't pay their cell phone bills. People have become so entitled that their first response to debt is "fuck it, I'm just not gonna pay it." People used to tighten their belt and do what needed to be done. Now they think it's someone else's problem. I understand that concept. I understand that these companies need to protect themselves. It's still fucking stupid.
I will be 33 years old this year. I have paid my own cell phone bill since I was 22 (only had one for a year before that). I was at Sprint for something like 7 years before their incompetence led me to leave. I've been with AT&T for the past 3 years. I have never not paid the bill. Sure, sometimes it's late, but only by a few days. That's there in their system. I'm not getting a new line of service. I'm not even getting a new phone. They want to run my credit and probably start a new 2 year contract (I've passed the contract date) so that I can qualify for a cell phone line I already have.
I couldn't make shit like that up. The really fucked up thing is that I don't know how good my credit is. I may not qualify for the cell phone I already have and have been paying for over the last 3 years.
Now tell me I'm over-reacting.
Since my contract is up, I was planning to wait until the iPhone 5 comes out later this year and possibly switch to -funny enough- Sprint. But since AT&T is fucking me, I'm going to talk to them this weekend. I realize they would probably run my credit and make me sign a new contract, but you know what? FUCK AT&T. This is what you do to good customers? This is how the fuck you repay loyalty? FUCK YOU AT&T. I'd rather pay more someone else than deal with you.
------------------------
Now that you've heard today's rant, I need some input. I've been wanting to do a podcast for a few years now. I've been trying to figure out what it should be.
I have two ideas right now.
1. Critical Mass - a discussion on how ridiculous we have become. I would discuss the stupidest news stories I can find and rant about it.
2. Storytime with Uncle Reb -I would invite guests on to tell stories about themselves. People are fascinating. Let's get to know them.
Which of these podcasts would you rather listen to?
Friday, April 13, 2012
And You May Ask Yourself, This Is Not My Beautiful Wife...
I feel like shit.
In retrospect, going back to Orlando for 4 days may have been a mistake. I had an amazing time. It was fantastic and I am as in love with that place as I ever was. Maybe more so. But also, I felt better out there. My feet hurt from the hours of walking and I was tired, but I felt so much better. I had energy. I felt alive and excited. I just wanted to keep going. And when it was time to leave, I was incredibly disappointed.
Ever since I've been back, it feels like I've been run over with a truck. It could be psycho-somatic. But the reality is that New Orleans isn't the most hospitable environment. There is literally something in the air. The humidity is daunting (though to be fair, the last few days haven't been all that humid). It's rough. I would fair better in almost any other part of the country. This isn't an epiphany. I know this. But it's been so long since I've sat and thought about it after a long trip, that I had forgotten how rough it is on me.
The fact is that New Orleans does not agree with me.
I'm in an odd position in my life. I don't really hate my life. I actually mostly like it. My jobs are fine. I like my friends. I'm not stuck at home watching tv every night. Aside from the constant worry of my finances, things are going well.
But man... this place. I need to get out of here.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
A few years back, I started blogs. Three of them.
http://rebelcomix.com was intended to be the website for the comic shop I wanted to start. I thought Rebel Comics was a good name for a store. Unfortunately, the market is so screwed up that I no longer believe comics are a sane business venture. So the site has become just another blog with no end goal.
http://exdcp.com was where I intended to post my stories from Disney as well as my thoughts in general on the subject. Unfortunately I never kept up with it and finally just let the site die last year.
http://URNasshole.com ...I bought this domain simply because it's an awesome name. I have ideas for things to do with it, but so far haven't done anything with it. I've been considering letting this one die as well.
Now all these blogs have existed due to a friend lending me a hand. Actually, that's putting it lightly. Baker let me put my blogs on his servers and there they've sat for quite a while now. I've never given him more than a "thank you", which says quite a bit about his generosity. Come to think of it; that says some very unflattering things about me as well.
Well now things have changed. Due to rising costs, he needs to charge me for being on his servers. DON'T MISUNDERSTAND. I'm not complaining about having to pay. Certainly, I owe him that. The fact is, had I the money to do so, I would have started paying him a long time ago. Sadly, it doesn't look like any of the sites will ever turn a profit.
I still post on Rebelcomix.com. However, most of my writing these days goes to BSIcomics.com, where I'm an unofficial employee. Rebelcomix has become the place I say things that others might regard as controversial. I'm not the most motivated person, so juggling multiple balls isn't going very well. I'm going to pay him for the rest of the year. But after that, I'm wondering if I should just let the sites all die. I have this blogspot site to discuss all my non-comic opinions. I suppose this could be all encompassing. Part of the reason I haven't done that is because I discuss political opinions here and I wanted to keep that far away from my comic posts unless it's directly related to comics.
I don't know what I'm going to do. Thoughts?
http://rebelcomix.com was intended to be the website for the comic shop I wanted to start. I thought Rebel Comics was a good name for a store. Unfortunately, the market is so screwed up that I no longer believe comics are a sane business venture. So the site has become just another blog with no end goal.
http://exdcp.com was where I intended to post my stories from Disney as well as my thoughts in general on the subject. Unfortunately I never kept up with it and finally just let the site die last year.
http://URNasshole.com ...I bought this domain simply because it's an awesome name. I have ideas for things to do with it, but so far haven't done anything with it. I've been considering letting this one die as well.
Now all these blogs have existed due to a friend lending me a hand. Actually, that's putting it lightly. Baker let me put my blogs on his servers and there they've sat for quite a while now. I've never given him more than a "thank you", which says quite a bit about his generosity. Come to think of it; that says some very unflattering things about me as well.
Well now things have changed. Due to rising costs, he needs to charge me for being on his servers. DON'T MISUNDERSTAND. I'm not complaining about having to pay. Certainly, I owe him that. The fact is, had I the money to do so, I would have started paying him a long time ago. Sadly, it doesn't look like any of the sites will ever turn a profit.
I still post on Rebelcomix.com. However, most of my writing these days goes to BSIcomics.com, where I'm an unofficial employee. Rebelcomix has become the place I say things that others might regard as controversial. I'm not the most motivated person, so juggling multiple balls isn't going very well. I'm going to pay him for the rest of the year. But after that, I'm wondering if I should just let the sites all die. I have this blogspot site to discuss all my non-comic opinions. I suppose this could be all encompassing. Part of the reason I haven't done that is because I discuss political opinions here and I wanted to keep that far away from my comic posts unless it's directly related to comics.
I don't know what I'm going to do. Thoughts?
Friday, January 6, 2012
Traditions 2011
I have a tradition that I've been doing for about 10 years.
At the end of every year I reflect on the past year; all the things I've accomplished and failed. Then I look at what I want to improve and focus on for the next year. Occasionally someone will point out that this is a New Year's Resolution. Well, at the risk of arguing semantics, it isn't. It's nothing structured like "eat less and go to the gym more". It's less about creating goals than it is focusing on the future. Shit, maybe it is just semantics. Ignore all that.
Originally I would embark on this tradition with a friend. I would go with whoever was interested to the lakefront with some kind of drink and we would discuss the past and the future. It quickly became difficult to find someone to go with me, so I took it online. Blogging the tradition made it easier to reflect on the past, because it allowed me to see exactly what I was supposed to be focusing on over the year and if I actually did it. Unfortunately, I think the 2010 blog is on a defunct website and therefor gone.
So anyway, 2011...
Man, this was a strange year for me. (Yes, I know it's technically 2012. Let's pretend I'm more timely.)
It started off very well. I got a new car. I booked a cruise. Got a second job which allowed me more financial freedom. Of course I lost that job over a very silly reason. I've been floundering financially ever since and the replacement job was a disaster which I had to quit. I'd taken out a loan to buy a new camera and ended up both without the camera and worse off financially.
I went back to Disney for 3 days in February. This was a big deal for me. I spend a lot of days listening to Sorcerer Radio or Mouseworld Radio; it gets me through the day. I hadn't been in Orlando since I left in early 2009. I've been longing for it since. Florida is the only place I've ever been really happy. I made a lot of mistakes in 2009, but the decision to move there is not among them. I just went about it wrong.
I sort of work for BSI Comics now, at least honorarily. I suspect Jason only gave the job because he took pity on me. Still, I feel honored. I love that place and I feel obliged to do anything I can to help it succeed. It's also nice to be able to put it on my resume.
I've also taken positive steps forward on my photography. Steps, not leaps. I'm only now starting to understand how much work I have ahead of me. The science of it takes a lot of work. I've always been a poor student when it comes to math and science. The art is the part that I love. Photography is fun for me. I get excited thinking about all the shots I'm going to take at a party or event. And when I see something that would make an amazing photograph, I feel obliged to stop everything so I can get it.
I didn't write much this year. My websites have had constant issues. Oftentimes they've been down. I finally let EXDCP expire. I wasn't posting on it. I often question my ability and desire as a writer. I love being a writer, but I just don't have the drive to be a great one.
2011 was a great year socially. I have a lot of really great friends. In fact, I don't know that I've ever had a time in my life when I was blessed with so many good friends. Maybe the College Program, but that was a very short time. There was no girlfriend in all this, but that's okay. In fact, that's great. I don't really want a girl right now. Sure, there are times when a lady would be convenient, but I don't want a relationship. I just want to have fun and live my life. There's time for love later.
For 2012...
I need to think more about the future and not the moment.
I know some of what I want. Figuring out how to get there is the big question. How do I become a better photographer? How do I fix my finances? How do I move to Orlando?
I need to work harder on the math when it comes to the photography. And I'm going to have to shoot more. I also need to get a copy of photoshop.
I need to decide if I need a new primary job. I like it here, but it's not getting me anywhere. And it reinforces the need for a second job.
Living in Orlando is still a ways off. But this is my 10 year anniversary for my College Program. I am working on a Reunion, but it isn't going very well. Nevertheless I will be there this year and it's going to be great. And it's time I worked on the book again. 10 years is long enough. I need to finish it.
I should probably work on being a better person though. I've been thinking a lot about who I've been and how I've been. Not much of it is flattering. I'm not sure this is the legacy I want to leave behind.
So I guess that's it. Here's to 2012. May it be the best year yet.
At the end of every year I reflect on the past year; all the things I've accomplished and failed. Then I look at what I want to improve and focus on for the next year. Occasionally someone will point out that this is a New Year's Resolution. Well, at the risk of arguing semantics, it isn't. It's nothing structured like "eat less and go to the gym more". It's less about creating goals than it is focusing on the future. Shit, maybe it is just semantics. Ignore all that.
Originally I would embark on this tradition with a friend. I would go with whoever was interested to the lakefront with some kind of drink and we would discuss the past and the future. It quickly became difficult to find someone to go with me, so I took it online. Blogging the tradition made it easier to reflect on the past, because it allowed me to see exactly what I was supposed to be focusing on over the year and if I actually did it. Unfortunately, I think the 2010 blog is on a defunct website and therefor gone.
So anyway, 2011...
Man, this was a strange year for me. (Yes, I know it's technically 2012. Let's pretend I'm more timely.)
It started off very well. I got a new car. I booked a cruise. Got a second job which allowed me more financial freedom. Of course I lost that job over a very silly reason. I've been floundering financially ever since and the replacement job was a disaster which I had to quit. I'd taken out a loan to buy a new camera and ended up both without the camera and worse off financially.
I went back to Disney for 3 days in February. This was a big deal for me. I spend a lot of days listening to Sorcerer Radio or Mouseworld Radio; it gets me through the day. I hadn't been in Orlando since I left in early 2009. I've been longing for it since. Florida is the only place I've ever been really happy. I made a lot of mistakes in 2009, but the decision to move there is not among them. I just went about it wrong.
I sort of work for BSI Comics now, at least honorarily. I suspect Jason only gave the job because he took pity on me. Still, I feel honored. I love that place and I feel obliged to do anything I can to help it succeed. It's also nice to be able to put it on my resume.
I've also taken positive steps forward on my photography. Steps, not leaps. I'm only now starting to understand how much work I have ahead of me. The science of it takes a lot of work. I've always been a poor student when it comes to math and science. The art is the part that I love. Photography is fun for me. I get excited thinking about all the shots I'm going to take at a party or event. And when I see something that would make an amazing photograph, I feel obliged to stop everything so I can get it.
I didn't write much this year. My websites have had constant issues. Oftentimes they've been down. I finally let EXDCP expire. I wasn't posting on it. I often question my ability and desire as a writer. I love being a writer, but I just don't have the drive to be a great one.
2011 was a great year socially. I have a lot of really great friends. In fact, I don't know that I've ever had a time in my life when I was blessed with so many good friends. Maybe the College Program, but that was a very short time. There was no girlfriend in all this, but that's okay. In fact, that's great. I don't really want a girl right now. Sure, there are times when a lady would be convenient, but I don't want a relationship. I just want to have fun and live my life. There's time for love later.
For 2012...
I need to think more about the future and not the moment.
I know some of what I want. Figuring out how to get there is the big question. How do I become a better photographer? How do I fix my finances? How do I move to Orlando?
I need to work harder on the math when it comes to the photography. And I'm going to have to shoot more. I also need to get a copy of photoshop.
I need to decide if I need a new primary job. I like it here, but it's not getting me anywhere. And it reinforces the need for a second job.
Living in Orlando is still a ways off. But this is my 10 year anniversary for my College Program. I am working on a Reunion, but it isn't going very well. Nevertheless I will be there this year and it's going to be great. And it's time I worked on the book again. 10 years is long enough. I need to finish it.
I should probably work on being a better person though. I've been thinking a lot about who I've been and how I've been. Not much of it is flattering. I'm not sure this is the legacy I want to leave behind.
So I guess that's it. Here's to 2012. May it be the best year yet.
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